"In heaven all the interesting people are missing."

"Not by wrath does one kill, but by laughter."

"All credibility, all good conscience, all evidence of truth come only from the senses."

"Convictions are the more dangerous enemy of truth than lies."

"I am a law only for my kind, I am no law for all."

"One should never know too precisely whom one has married."

"PATRIOT, n. One to whom the interests of a part seem superior to those of the whole. The dupe of statesmen and the tool of conquerors."

"Punctuality is the virtue of the bored."

"When I get smitten, I stay smut."

"I think of myself as an intelligent, sensitive human being with the soul of a clown which always forces me to blow it at the most important moments."

"Heirlooms we don't have in our family. But stories we've got."

"O, beware, my lord, of jealousy! It is the green-eyed monster which doth mock the meat it feeds on."