"When it comes to sex, the most important six inches are the ones between the ears."

"Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe."

"Going to the opera, like getting drunk, is a sin that carries its own punishment with it, and that a very severe one."

"Promises that you make to yourself are often like the Japanese plum tree - they bear no fruit."

"Keep true, never be ashamed of doing right; decide on what you think is right and stick to it."

"What can we see, read, acquire, but ourselves. Take the book, my friend, and read your eyes out, you will never find there what I find."

"There are plenty of good five-cent cigars in the country. The trouble is they cost a quarter. What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel."

"The most astonishing thing about miracles is that they happen."

"Make the best use of what is in your power, and take the rest as it happens."

"I find that when I do not think of myself I do not think at all."